August 5, 2019
Jess and Mats live in Brisbane, but as Jess’s parents own a stunning property in Murwillumbah, their decision on where to marry was an easy one. When I first met with them at the property, it was the middle of summer, very hot and very dry! But they were marrying in Autumn, my favourite time of year so I couldn’t wait to see their vision come to life.
They both requested a run through the day before the ceremony, it’s not always necessary but something many celebrants offer as part of the service. It’s a way in which you and your partner can calm the butterflies before the big day, and make sure your sometimes-chaotic wedding party know where to walk and stand.
When I arrived at the rehearsal, their celebration of love had well and truly started. I was handed a beer and we got to work in attempting the walkthrough.
I actually enjoy rehearsals, it’s a way in which we can all get to know one another just a little more before the special moment and it’s a good way to find out if any of bridesmaids or groomsmen have any last-minute requests. A couple of Jess’s maids were a little cautious about walking on the uneven grass in heels, and couldn’t stop looking at their feet. So I suggested they make eye contact with me as each of them walked down the aisle – it worked a treat!
On the big day the air was a buzz with love and party vibes. As we waited for the bridal party to arrive I had some fun with Mats, his groomsmen and Mats Dad, who had arrived from Norway just in time for the nuptials. This always helps to settle everyone into the moment, particularly the groom, and the guys standing up the front and creates the tone for the entire wedding event.
Mats and Jess have been together for a long time, they both admitted to being just kids when they met, both studying on the Gold Coast in 2007, they’ve grown more and more solid every year, continually surprising one another, and at the very core of their love, they give the other the space to just live, never nagging one another, just allowing the other to be.
Jess admits to learning patience with Mats as marriage wasn’t part of his culture. In that, he nor any of his friends, really had the big dream of getting married when he was a kid. Mats was born in Norway, but his upbringing didn’t stop him, and he romantically proposed on their 10th anniversary.
Jess shared with me they both fall more deeply in love with one another every day and act as an old married couple anyway, so it just made sense. But of course, that’s not the only reason, Mats is incredibly caring, he has the kindest nature and people are just drawn to him.
He has all the qualities Jess loved so much about her own Father, who sadly had passed away just a few years before. Which just goes to show the belief of us ‘girls marrying someone like our Father’ is true. Jess asked me to write a sentence that honoured her Dad to include in the ceremony, something short but meaningful. They were also using a vintage table and chairs for the signing of the marriage register, the table was Jess’s Grandmother’s and Jess’s Dad used to sit at it daily and drink his coffee in the sun.
“Jess’s Dad loved Mats and saw him as a son from their very first meeting, eating fish and ships by the seaside, it would’ve made him so happy to have Mats officially join his family, and his light will be shining brightly on you both today”.
You wouldn’t believe it, but as I said these words the sun appeared more brightly through the trees and we took a moment to just absorb the light and appreciate the silence.
Not everyone asks for love poetry within their ceremony, but it was important for Jess to include a poem that truly spoke to her and Mats love. She chose a poem by Tijani Adebowale Destiny. I read this directly to Mats but asked him to look at Jess while I did.
I Promise You.
I can’t promise you that dark clouds will never hover over our lives,
Or that the future will always bring us rainbows,
I can’t promise that tomorrow will be perfect or that life will be easy.
I can promise you my everlasting devotion,
My loyalty, my respect
And my unconditional love for an entire lifetime.
I can promise that I will always be here for you,
To listen and to hold your hand,
And I’ll always do my best to make you happy and make you feel loved.
I can promise that I’ll see you through any crisis,
And dream with you, laugh with you and build with you,
And always cheer you on and encourage you.
I can promise that I’ll willingly be your protector,
Your advisor, your counsellor,
Your friend, your family,
I promise this to you.
Mats shared with me that he never really had any dreams, only short-term goals, but now for the first time he had a long-term goal where he wanted to start a family with the most beautiful person he knew.
He told me that Jess values her relationships with others above everything else, and is a characteristic he truly values in her. Their relationship demonstrates marriage doesn’t get you to the point where you want to be with someone, but marriage is what you do when you are at a certain point.
Jordan Peterson once said ‘Life is suffering, through a series of problems that matures us. And, love is the desire to see unnecessary suffering ameliorated – helping to ease the burden of coping with said problems’. Jess, aside from her stunning beauty, helps Mats to achieve this through the simplest yet pleasurable things in life; enjoying each other’s company. Whether that is cooking a nice meal together, getting a big hug after a long day, climbing into a warm bed on a cold winter’s night just trying to figure life out in general. Mats has never met anyone who cares more about the relationships in their life as Jess, and Mats is truly honoured that she had chosen him to be her most treasured love.
It was at this point in the ceremony where I looked up to the crowd and you could literally hear the trees rustling in the wind, it was that quiet, everyone was so moved by Jess and Mats’s love, and it took me just a brief moment to compose my own emotions.
And that’s when I asked everyone to give up a huge cheer to celebrate the true love these two obviously had for one another! That always helps to bring everyone back into the moment.
Everyone partied way into the night, and there were many more emotional times throughout the night but that didn’t stop the amazing party of love these two had built with one another!
I always take a little piece of my couple’s ceremonies away with me, I can’t help it! But this one was truly something very special, and definitely a career highlight!
The team that brought all of the magic together on the day.
Jess and her bridesmaid’s beauty was enhanced by Blushing Bohemian
And everyone was fed deliciously by Bilambil Farm.
They didn’t honeymoon straight away they waited until they both had extended leave in December. They hired a van and travelled the South Island of New Zealand.
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